"You're funny - you should write a blog..."

I get that alot. But here's the thing - I find the Swedish Chef hilarious, but I don't want to read his musings every day. Mostly because I don't speak Swedish.

I'm glad people think I'm funny, but really, I'm just doing it because I like to write. And every since the "Mom finding my diary" incident of 1981, I'm reluctant to commit anything to paper.

At least three days a week, I feel like such a cliche. Single. Lives with cats. Has too many shoes. Never missed an episode of Sex and the City. Hey look - overpriced coffee drinks - my favourite! And in some ways, I am.

But here's a better picture, my belief system if you will:

I believe...

...that women should not share clothes with their daughters. If it's in your sixteen year old's closet, leave it there. Possible exceptions - really nice jeans, ballet flats, vintage Chanel, and that mustard coloured bag you never use, Mom.

...that my cats can most likely talk, but they just don't feel I have anything to contribute to the conversation.

...cupcakes can make any day just a little bit better.

...a really good bottle of wine and some flirting will do more for your complexion than any microdermabrasion.

...you shouldn't lie about your age. Or about any procedures you've had done. However, it's perfectly fine to lie about the age at which you started having those procedures.

...a woman will always be a little in love with her first. Hey - John Taylor - call me. I know Duran Duran is probably recording again and stuff, but seriously, my Mom can't keep us apart anymore.