Hey, It's Okay!

One of my favourite features in one of my favourite magazines is an often funny, sometimes poignant, frequently bang-on list of little things we all (well, most of us) do that we tend to beat ourselves up over. Call 'em what you will - neuroses, tics, quirks, whatever. The goal of the list? To tell us all that, when it comes to our little peccadilloes, "hey, it's okay!"  Why do I love it so much? Probably because I have a championship belt in beating myself up. But, lately, I've really been trying to give myself a break.

Lately, I've realized it's okay...

...to bake an entire pan of brownies or squares just because you want one, and then pack up the rest to take to work. It's also okay for the size of  "one" brownie or square to be somewhat loosely defined.

...to sort of hate the girls who leave the gym looking all cute and presentable, with nothing more than a slight glow to show for their efforts. I look like I need an ambulance.

...to give "supermodel face" in the mirror when trying to pick new glasses. Everyone knows they look much better when you do that, even if you'll never actually make that face again once you buy them.

...to forego cleaning the basement/putting away the patio furniture/storing your summer clothes, all in favour of a cup of tea and a terrific book.

...to say a completely un-ironic "absolutely" when the barista asks if you'd like whipped cream on that skinny Pumpkin Spice latte you just ordered. I said skinny, not anorexic. Besides, it's a serving of dairy, right?

...to feel resentment every time you settle up at the dry cleaners. I feel like I'm bailing my clothes out.of the drunk tank.

...to choose not to patronize restaurants that haven't spellchecked their menus. What else are they not paying attention to? Besides the spelling of "nacho's"?

...to have one guilty pleasure tv show you are unapologetic about loving. I've said it before - I can't get enough "America's Next Top Model".

...to have one guilty pleasure tv show you couldn't be more embarrassed about if it were German scat porn. You'll always be my dirty little secret, "Vampire Diaries".

...to admit that you'd really just rather stay home on your couch.

...to have incredibly fond memories of people you never want to see again.

...to question the sanity of people who continue to find Adam Sandler funny. Holy fuck - I watched 20 minutes of "Just Go With It" last night, and it was like being felt like sensory deprivation, only the sense I was being deprived of was humour. Thankfully, I tapped out before what I assume was the obligatory Rob Schneider cameo.

...to believe 100% that the scale at the gym is rigged in a diabolical attempt to guilt you into paying a crazy amount of money for personal training. See also...to estimate the weight of your new sneakers as approximately 12 and a half pounds.

...to have two weeks off but not post a thing on your blog. Inspiration, as it turns out, cannot be found in Pumpkin Spice lattes. They should really put that on the sign; I would have saved a lot of money these past two weeks.

I should note, the "hey, it's okay" concept does have limits; it's not a get out of jail free list. For example, stabbing a co-worker in the eye with a fork because the way they pronounce "tomato" makes you crazy is NOT okay.

Thinking about it, however, is perfectly acceptable.