Anything you can do...

My friends and I have spent a lot of time lately lamenting how things seemed better in our 20s. How many sentences have started with "when I was 25" recently? I don't think a single one of us would want to be back there; most of us were idiots. Or dating them. But we've been romanticizing it all the same. Here's the thing - I don't think there's a single thing I did better then than I do now.

1) I'm a better friend, I think. Sure, we've all been the star of our very own self-centrefold, but there's a maturity and a depth to many of my friendships that's based on more than just borrowing clothes and meeting guys. And the classic younger woman one-upmanship friendships are largely gone, which is a relief; it was exhausting.

2) I'm a better daughter. I didn't really know my father's parents, but I was 25 and then 39 when Mom's parents died, and I think losing your grandparents well into adulthood is totally different. Seeing your parents lose their parents, as an adult, really drives home how it changes a person.

3) I'm a better cook. Of course it's partly because I have more experience, partly because I discovered good cheese, and partly because I now own a mezzaluna, a food processor and a lemon zester. But mostly it's because I've realized there are few things more enjoyable than making a meal for others in your own home. Granted, there was a method to all the nacho madness: George the really hot waiter at JJ Rossy's.

4) Sex. At 25, it's often about hormones and conquest. Now it's self-confidence and self-awareness and the knowledge that some things should not be rushed. Unless you want to. Or if Anderson Cooper is on in 15 minutes.

5) Speaking of which, I'm a better girlfriend. I've figured out that wanting someone to be something they're not works about 0% of the time. Besides, I pretty much wear my own foibles like this season's statement necklace, so I can't expect anything different from a partner. Granted, this one's theoretical, since all the single men around my age want to date 25 year olds. Irony, party of one.

6) I'm smarter. I know what I don't know,and I know when I'm wrong. And believe me, in my mid 20s, I knew that I was wrong about nothing. Except guys. And clothing choices. And which types of booze should really NOT be mixed.

7) I'm better at failing. Or I'm trying to be. I've never been a perfectionist, exactly, but I used to let failure eat at me. Now, I really try to give things over to a combination of timing, luck and trying my best. Sure, there are those rare people who always get the guy, and the job, and the great concert tickets, but for most of us, that isn't reality. And that's okay. I think dealing with the little failures and disappointments (and trust me, between 25 and now, there have been many) puts the bigger ones into perspective.

I don't mean to sound like I'm done, that I've learned it all and have become the version of me I'll always be. So thanks, 25 - you were a lot of fun, but I never want to see you again. And I have every intention of revisiting this when I'm 60 and marvelling at how little I knew in my early 40s.